Blackjack V Poker and why I no longer play the latter…
Afternoon, everyone. I should have been jetting off on a quick break to Florence this week with the wife, but thanks to that bloody great cloud of ash our trip was cancelled. I couldn’t reschedule at short notice because of work commitments so it looks like we’ll have to wait for our getaway.
On the plus side, this does give me time to write a quick blog post. Unfortunately I won’t be offering insightful reportage on the wonders of northern Italy, but indulging in my favourite subject matter – casinos.
Word reaches me through my contacts that a punter just took around 75k out of one of the UK’s top online casinos, with a nice bit of action on Ten Play Jacks Or Better, which is a poker game. People often come up to me when I’m at the blackjack tables and ask why I don’t turn my obvious skill to poker, which some see as the most viscerally thrilling casino game on Earth.
The truth: I don’t fancy it. Poker has never really appealed to me (although I’m sure we can all see the positives in winning 75 grand from an online casino); there’s too much posturing involved. Of course, I played it quite successfully in my younger days – you have to, if you’re to get anywhere in the casino world. Back then I could stare a statue out at ten paces and still have enough moisture on my eyeballs to flash a cheeky wink at the loser when I took the pot. ‘Stoneface Miles’, I used to call myself. There was no telling my hand from my face. I swear the whole time I was playing poker my mouth moved only to offer mocking consolation to those parting with their cash.
But that’s ultimately what I didn’t like about it. Too much machismo, not enough fun. Blackjack is a much more vibrant scene. When we’re all round the table it’s like a team of us versus the house, each edging the other on to beat the dealer. Camaraderie. Of course, I often win, but I never feel in competition with my fellow players – they’re just happy that someone at the table is having some luck.
I guess if you were to sum up the key difference between blackjack and poker you’d have to say that it all boils down to the atmosphere surrounding a game. Your average poker table is like a nest of snakes all slithering around a golden egg, whereas blackjack is much more fun, like a field full of happy dogs.
I’ll leave you with the story of the last time I played poker. I was on a streak – as I so often am – of remarkable luck, convinced I couldn’t lose. We were in one of Mayfair’s top venues and in walked this Russian chap, very flash, mean-looking. He pitches in to the game with a double or quits gambit and me – never one to turn down some free adrenaline – takes him up straight away. The other players back away from the table. We play for a while and I’m feeling pretty good, shoulders loose (possibly because of the fine malt I’d been enjoying) but faced fixed. Slowly I’d amassed what I thought was a winning hand: a straight flush consisting of the 7, 8, 9, 10, and Jack of Clubs. I prepared to lay down. There’s no way this guys will beat me – I am fireproof, I thought. He laid down his cards. By this time we’d put in about 15 grand each. Then it hit me. A Royal Flush. Hearts. The Unbeatable Hand. There was nothing I could have done. I lost all my money. I left the casino and couldn’t speak to anyone for three days.
That’s why I don’t play poker.
